Reflections on Blizzard or Hurricane Prep

Blizzard. Hurricane. No, I am not thinking about the ice cream treat or drink by those names. Either would be more fun, than the weather events.

We are in the middle of living through our first hurricane season (June – November) in central Florida. Prior to this we endured more blizzards than we would like to count. Though they are very different weather events, there is a great deal of similarity in the preparation.

Hype. I understand by using that word I am indicating that there is some sensationalism to the reports we hear. Forecasting for both blizzards and hurricanes has improved, but still to a large degree a guessing game. Very rarely did the blizzards hit the areas, or with the intensity that the forecasters thought. Already we are seeing that the “cone of error” for Hurricane Dorian covers a 600-700 mile area. Still we don’t want to be caught off guard in either scenario, so that leads us to the next similarity . . .

Shopping frenzy. For blizzards the time period seemed to be 24 hours or less in advance to load up on milk, bread and eggs. For hurricanes the prep begins months ahead to have shopping-3225130_1280as much on hand as possible when the storm approaches. The lines for gas and last-minute groceries seems to start about 4 days in advance. For hurricanes people are not concerned with eggs and milk – we may not have power. But the bread and shelf stable food along with bottles of water and batteries are a must.

Uncertainty. I remember often with blizzards wondering if we should cancel a meeting or appointment a day or two out. One does not want to appear foolish or uncaring if we did get dumped on with snow and ice. But how many times does one change their schedule only to find it was not needed? In hurricanes the uncertainty revolves around do we go, or do we stay? Today it may look like we can stay, the next report may say the eye is coming to our specific address (or so it seems).

From where I sit today, here is what I know:

1) People are people. Every area, every event, is going to have people who don’t believe anything will happen, and others who believe we are facing Armageddon. Their response depends on many factors. My response depends only on one factor – Grace. When anxieties and uncertainty flare around us, a response of grace is always in season and fits the forecast.

2) Technology and forecasting have improved significantly over the years. Even the best acknowledges there is a large margin of error. I need to listen and wisely process the updates. My trust, however, cannot be in those forecasts, or my preparation. There is only One in whom I can trust. The One whom the winds and waves obey (Matthew 8:27).

3) As I prepare my home, family and self to the best extent possible I cling (pun intended as I think of a hurricane) to the truth of Romans 8: 38-39. Nothing – not height, depth, wind, rain, snow, ice, or flying debris can separate me from the love of God (my adapted paraphrase of the verses).

So thquestion-mark-160071_1280ere’s my reflections on preparations. What are yours? No matter where you live you likely have some type of environmental event to deal with. How do you prepare?

Thanks for the Compliment

A few hours ago, I returned from a weekend away with some ladies. Jerry encourages me to take advantage of opportunities like this, and works hard to schedule enough attendants to cover my time away. He tells me the first 24 hours I am away he enjoys full control of the remote. Which means, at least at this season, baseball is on all the time. If it is not on the television, he is watching a game in person.

By the second day the novelty has worn off and he is ready for me to come home. He remembers all the things he did not enjoy about living alone.

Like most of you, when I come home I unpack my car. We update each other on our time apart. And then it happens, no matter what time of day it is Jerry apologizes that he needs a little nap. I know that a little nap in this situation means a long solid period of deep sleep.
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I sometimes forget how much energy Jerry expends to live day to day. When I am away he does his best to keep things as tidy and together as he is able, increasing the amount of energy he expends. Giving me the grace to get a break, he accepts greater responsibility on his personal resources.

I could be frustrated that after being apart for a few days, I come home and he sleeps. Instead, I embrace it as a compliment. To me, it means he feels safe and content. We both know we’ll have the time to talk and tackle all the life decisions we have ahead of us tomorrow. Lord willing that is. And if we aren’t gifted that time tomorrow, we won’t need to worry about the decisions.

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Is there something in your life that could bother or irritate you, but it you look at it from another perspective it brings you joy. I would love to hear your story. Please share.

 

Little Kindnesses

This week I was the beneficiary of some little kindnesses that impacted me in such a big way I want to share.

Here’s the scene. We were ready to head home from Ohio after a family visit. The drive, with stops, is about 10 hours. We’ve each driven it by ourselves. In more recent years sharing the drive has proved a healthier choice. The problem this time was that Jerry was not feeling well. I felt cautiously optimistic that I could complete the drive home, but still had a few friends join me in prayer.

Man with Binoculars

When packing the van, the hoyer lift always goes in first. I rolled it through the lobby to go out.  I noticed a few business men waiting for someone in the lobby.  I took the hoyer apart, loaded it into the van and came back in just as this group was leaving.  One of the men stepped toward me ever so slightly and looked me right in the eyes and said, “you have a good day.” Odd though it may sound, that small greeting spoke deeply to me.  It said he had acknowledged my responsibility and wanted to share a word of kindness with me. It felt like God was saying to me, “I see what you need to do today, I am watching and will be with you.”

The next load was the shower chair and a portable table.  As I rolled these items out a different man stopped and asked if I needed any assistance.  I’ve done this so long on my own that sometimes assistance is more of a hindrance than a help, and these were easy to pack.  I thanked him but told him I had this ok.  Again, another small kindness that spoke deeply to my soul on a day when I felt an enormous weight on my shoulders.

I doubt I could ever identify these two men, but I am grateful to them.  Likely they will never know the impact their 3 to 5 second phrase made in me.  But that’s ok.  I know. And God used their kindness to encourage my heart and remind me that I was not doing this trip on my own.

I even had back-seat kindness on the trip – whenever Jerry woke up on he checked in to see if I was ok, and then went right back to sleep.  I am glad I could minister to him by letting him rest, and we made it home safely.

I came home grateful, and reminded that it often is the little expressions of kindness and grace we share with someone that matter.  We may not ever know if, or how, our words or actions mattered.  But Proverbs 3:27 reminds us to do good to others when we have the ability to do so (my paraphrase).

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Driving Mr Jerry

This is week 3 of Jerry using his back up wheelchair while waiting on a new right motor for his regular chair. As I noted last week, that means he is unable to drive his van.

If you live with disability in your family you know that this is not all that unusual, these things happen. Paperwork drags on and on, calls don’t get returned, repairs can take weeks, if not months. Most of us could win a Gold Medal if waiting or insurance hassles were Olympic sports.

The difference this week is that I am back from my trip, and I am now, “Driving Mr Jerry.”  (Too bad a movie like that has already been made, I am sure ours would be a hit comedy)!  At least he is no longer housebound.

Yesterday Jerry had scheduled service for the lift on his van. There was no sense in him going along for the ride. I rearranged my schedule and took the van to the appointed service, about 45 minutes away from home. The shop is fantastic and provides a nice waiting area. I packed enough work to keep me busy for three years.

322615_3126101352345_993835468_oPrior to the van appointment I met with someone who has a child with a disability. My friend commented about how weary she is. She went on to say one way she keeps going is to realize what a privilege it is to serve Jesus by serving her child. She asked if that was the same among spouses?  As I thought about it she went on to describe how my trip to take the van for service was serving Jesus.

My life goal has been to love and serve God by loving and serving others. Given that, my friend’s comment should have been no surprise to me, but it was. I love Jerry, which means that (most days) it is a pleasure and joy to assist him. But I had somehow forgotten that by serving him I am also serving my Lord.

That reminder put a new spin on my day. When I got home that evening after running other errands the unexpected visitors we had, the unplanned need Jerry asked me to help with were no big deal. Getting to love and serve others while remembering that by doing so I am loving and serving God changed my perspective.

Instead of fretting about not getting a Marriage Monday post up until Tuesday, I chose to invest in and love my spouse and the others God brought to me that day. I hope you’ll forgive my delay.

Knowing that sometimes people who have a disability feel they become burdensome to their family or close friends I made a commitment to God and myself early in our marriage. I would choose to show joy when asked to assist (even being woken from a sound sleep in the middle of the night), and to always complete the task by saying “I love you” and sharing a kiss. I have missed that mark a few times, but it is still the goal for which I aim.

push for helpWhat about you?  What is it that helps you readjust your focus when you are worn and weary?  Do you have a strategy you use to keep your relationships healthy in the unpredictable dailyness of disability?

Living Under the Cloud

Tech geeks, I am sorry.  If you clicked here looking for technical insights into the cloud where our lives and data circle overhead, you are at the wrong place. I am writing about “THE Cloud,” as identified in the Biblical book of Numbers.

I am a planner. I like to know what is going to happen next. I want to be fully prepared. No surprises here (unless they are chocolate and raspberry!).

In our family, Jerry is the visionary. He sees that mountain out in the distance and knowsdachstein-2863756_1920 that is the destination. What he doesn’t see (but I do) are the miles of gullies, hills, rocks,and the ongoing forest of trees that we must pass through before we reach that mountain.  And none of it is wheelchair accessible! Our differences make us a good team, or at least as he puts it, “makes us fun to watch.”

My penchant for the process is why I have boxes already packed and sorted, though our move is still some time away. That is why when reading Numbers earlier this month I spent so much time pondering the adventures of the children of Israel. We know there were at least two million people making this trek through the desert. I am thankful I was not asked to be their trip coordinator.

They had GPS, but not on a smart phone. Their GPS came directly from God who told them their arrival time would be in 40 years. Rather than giving them turn by turn 0379a-img_3505directions, He guided them with a cloud by day and a fire by night. Directionally that’s all they had.

When the cloud moved they (yes, all two million of them) moved. When the cloud stopped, they stopped. When they stopped they did not know if they were setting up camp for one night or for a year. They just knew they were to stay there until the cloud moved again.

When Jerry and I travel if we are stopping only one night in transit I pack a smaller bag with the things needed just for that night. Once we see the set up in the hotel we decide if we can make it work with the slide board. If we can, I leave the hoyer lift, shower chair, etc. in the van. It’s just so much work for one night.

I don’t think I would have been a good Israelite woman in this caravan.

“What?  You mean I unpacked every camel’s saddle bags and all the packs on the donkeys last night and now we need to leave again?”

“Jeremiah” (the Hebrew root for Jerry), “do you remember which camel we packed the cooking pot in?  If we aren’t staying here long I don’t want to unpack everything, but I can’t find it.”

trip-1422608_1920I know the children of Israel failed God many times in their journey by grumbling, complaining and jealousy. But I have a newfound respect for them when I think about their 40-year journey.

I too can easily fall into grumbling, questioning, doubt and the need to control. Forgive me God. Lord teach me to wait on you. Seems like the skies are lightening, but your cloud over our home has not yet moved. Help me to make the most of this time of waiting; and to be ready when you say it’s time to move.

My Christmas Celebration

Emmanuel. God with us. That is usually the name of God I ponder most over the Christmas season. But this morning I woke with another one of my Savior’s name on my heart. Jehovah – Rapha, the God who heals.

I woke up feeling a little sorry for myself, that I have missed church for three of the last four weeks due to this lingering bronchitis and sinusitis.  And now for Christmas Eve, candle-2874571_1920when we usually attend one service at our church and one with my sister and her family at their church, I am not going to any. And to top it all off, this may be the last Christmas we celebrate in the north.

Then the truth hit me. Emmanuel is still here with me, even as I cough, sneeze and sniffle.  And this God with me is also the One who is healing my body, and truly providing the breath in my lungs when they are hard to come by. I can worship and celebrate Him in my home, yet still join in the chorus of those around the world celebrating Jesus’ birth.

heart-2338154_1920Even better than that great truth is that Emmanuel is not only healing my body, but more importantly He has healed my soul and heart.  In fact, that’s the whole reason He came as a baby – so He could model how to live in communion with our Father, and show us what obedience means – giving up His very own sinless life on a cross to pay the penalty my sin deserved.  And He did that for you too!

Does it sound like I am crazy to say my God is with me and heals me even though He died?  Not at all, because death did not have victory over Jesus.  Instead, He rose from the dead and now His Spirit is alive and at work.

So here I sit with my hot tea, tissue box, blanket and Christmas music directing my heart and thanks Heavenward. How about you? What name of God are you pondering? If you want to know more about this inner healing Jehovah Rapha brings, or the companionship of Emmanuel just ask, I’d love to tell you more.

Happy Birthday Jesus and Merry Christmas dear readers.

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What A Difference A Year Makes

Today has been a mostly ordinary day.  I helped Jerry get up.  I went to my part time job at the financial planners, and was able to confidently carry out my tasks with the knowledge I have gained there this year.  When my shift ended I attended a team meeting with my seeJesus Bethesda teammates in which we did some final planning for our upcoming fundraiser.  It is exciting to see the event and team come together.  Then I took a call from another seeJesus co-worker who shared a project that is just starting and asked if I would like to consider being involved with it.

As I pondered this request, as well as some other connections that came my way today I marveled at God’s goodness and grace.  You see, it was one year ago today, on this very rope-667319_1280date that Jerry and I got the first very clear information that life as we knew it was about to unravel.  We didn’t know the details, we didn’t know exactly how or when, but as the cliche says, the end was in sight.

To say November 2016 Started us on a tumultuous journey is an understatement.  But we’ve all been through our own kinds of floods, fires and trials.  You don’t need to hear the “down and dirty” from me.

What I do want you to hear is that our God is faithful!  Here we are at November 1, 2017 and we are growing in our new work and ministry roles, we have some exciting plans for our future, and we are stronger in our marriage than we’ve ever been.

Are we all the way through this rough spot?  Probably not – people tell us it will likely dance in and out of our lives for years to come.  But that’s ok – we are more snug in our cord of three, and that’s a knot I never want to undo!

Ecclesiastes 4:12 NIV

Though one may be overpowered,
    two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.rope-970023_1280